My mom and I

My mom is my hero ... If you knew how we were as I was growing up, you'd be surprised by this statement.  Not because I didn't love my mom, but because we were so different and we expressed ourselves very differently.  I came to realize years later that my mom wasn't disappointed in me because I was a "tomboy", or because I never learned how to sew or cook, etc.  She just wished we were closer growing up, as did I, and I regret not trying harder.  But like in anything, dwelling on regrets only hurts us and keeps us "stuck".

It is days like today though, that I think about my mom a lot and miss her a lot.  We grew a lot closer in the last five or so years, ironically, when she was losing her ability to talk and remember conversations after we had them.  There are two conversations I will NEVER forget ...

As I helped her into bed one night, I tucked her in and she grabbed my face with her hands and told me what a blessing I was to her.  I think it was because of my attempt to do her nails during this particular visit!  I laid on the bed with her until she fell asleep, and thought how many times must she have done that for me as a child.

The other conversation was similar.  I got her into her chair and she took my face, again into her shaking hands, and told me I was her hero.  I thought to myself why in the world would she think that.  I will never know ... But I said, no mom, you are MY hero.  Why?

1.  She mothered three kids whom she did not give birth to.
2.  She raised them, often by herself, as my dad was involved in the ministry God had for our family.
3.  She made our house a home on very little money.  We never wanted for anything. Every birthday was a BIG deal.
4.  She went back to finish college and earn two master's degrees once we all were in high school and beyond.  She would go to school, take care of us, making sure we always had dinner together, went to our games, often after her classes.  I don't know how she did it.
5.  She always put so much time and thought into gifts for us all the way up until she could no longer make anything with her hands.
6.  She battled two ugly diseases with dignity and humor, without complaining.  I'm sure she had her moments, which she was allowed to have, but I never heard her complain.

There are more to this list ... But ... SHE is MY hero ...